Saturday, April 25, 2009

in MY weakness HE is strong

I hit rock bottom earlier this afternoon.
I recieved an e-mail from another blogging friend, one that I'd been waiting for for a while. While reading her e-mail and then replying to it, I started crying, and didn't stop for almost 45 min. later. Reading ALL that I have been through, not just in the past year, but my whole life, was vary harrowing for me. It brought back a flood of emotions, replay's of my life, and it made me even more determined to find someone who KNOWS what they are talking about reguarding my medical care.
During my meltdown, I made me a iTunes playlist of songs that would help me get through my current situation. I took my Bible, started reading one particular passage, and started praying. With the music playing in my ears, scripture in my head, and God filling me with HIS strength, I drifted off to sleep. Awakeing almost 2 hours later, feeling somewhat refreshed, and a little bit stronger.
Please continue to keep me in your prayers. This weekend, I feel will not end up good, meaning I will find myself in the hospital by the end of it. I'm hurting, I can't keep food down, tube feeds hurt.
I want to share the scripture passage, that I have taken to be my new life passage.

2 Corinthians 12:7-10, (The Message)
"Because of the extravagance of those revelations,
and so I wouldn't get a big head,
I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations.
Satan's angel did his best to get me down;
What he in fact did was push me to my knees.
No danger then of walking around high and mighty!
At first I didn't think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it.
Three times I did that, and then he told me,
"My grace is enough; it's all you need.
My strength comes into its own in your weakness."
Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen.
I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift.
It was a case of Christ's strength moving in on my weakness.
Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer,
these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks.
I just let Christ take over!
And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become."


Agnes said...

Prayed for you this am.

waitingarms said...

Praying for strength and wisdom for all the health professionals involved in your care. I hope the verse below is some encouragement to you today.

"He said to me," 'My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.' "Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

NB: I had these verses in mind, but then I just re-read your post and this is also the same scripture you are holding onto! I guess the Message has a very different rendering of the verses that I had not recognized it was the same scripture I had in mind! Anyway God's blessings to you and hope you are out of the valley and on your way to the mountaintop.