Cancer

I found out yesterday that my mom has cancer... again.
She got breast cancer my senior year of high school, a month before I graduated.
This time though she doesn't have breast cancer, she has cancer in her left hip and bone. And it's a different type of cancer from what the breast cancer was.
Thankfully, she returned to her old oncologist, and he has already started her on cancer meds.
On top of this, my mom is also having alot of neurological issues. She has short term memory loss, she has been shaking really bad, and some other neuro issues. We are going to see the neuro Dr. tomorrow, and she will order tests: MRI, blood work, etc, and we will wait again for more results and see what is wrong with my mom's brain.
Please keep my mom in your prayers. She is my primary caregiver... I am sick too and have been for the past 5 years. I have had 20 surgeries in the past 2 years alone, and I am having my 2nd surgery this year in 2 weeks to put in a 3rd feeding tube (my stomach doesn't work). My Dr.'s are not optimistic about this tube working, but it's the last chance that I have. If it doesn't work, or my body rejects it, then I will have to begin IV/TPN nutrition, and that is only used as a last result. But, I have lost 30 lbs in less than 3 months, and I am losing weight everyday, and my body can't keep up. I'm only eating about 600 calories a day, which is nowhere near where a normal person would eat.
I have several other major health issues that need to be addressed too, but me getting nutrition in me is the 1st and highest priority.

Please just pray for my mom and me. Pray for our family. Pray for the Dr.'s that are treating us.

Thank you for your prayers.
Emily

Fall 2011

I haven't updated since May and I haven't had anything big happen.
I am still battling a several different medical issues: a bummed knee (that will require surgery to fix), degenerative disc disorder in my lower back, heart issues, frequent pneumonia (caused by aspirating, can only be fixed by surgery), severe pain problems (even though I'm on huge doses of pain meds), there is more stuff, but these are just a few things I dealing with.
I have wanted to write more, but there just isn't much to say.
All I can do is ask for prayers.

surgeron appt.

I went yesterday to see my ortho surgeon who did my knee surgery last Nov. My knee has not gotten back to 100% due to my PCL tear. She had told me after my surgery that 95% of people that tear their PCL don't normally need the PCL fixed, but there is always that 5% of people that must have the tear repaired for the knee to get better and the pain to go away. Well, I have fallen into that 5% group. I am going back to the office tomorrow to see a different ortho surgeon, and all he does is knee ligament tears. I am hoping that I can schedule knee surgery within the next 2 weeks.

This knee surgery will be a BIG deal. From the research that I have done, plus what the Dr. told me yesterday the only way to repair a PCL tear is with a ligament transplant or ligament graft. I won't know all till tomorrow, but my knee won't last much longer without it being fixed.

I have other surgeries to schedule, but my knee is giving me the most issues right now.

Please pray that I can have this done soon, and I will update fully when I know more.

Heart Surgery

I am having heart surgery tomorrow morning.


I have to be at the hospital at 8:30am, and the hospital is a hour and half away, which means we are leaving at 6:45am. I don't know what time my surgery is, but all I do know is that I am getting 1 if not 2 devices implanted into my heart. The 1st one being a recorder which will montior and record my heart beats and rythmns. The 2nd device will be a defibilator.



I was suppose to have a pacemake/defib put in, but the cardiac surgeon realized that if we were to put those in now, I would never be able to get them out.

These 2 devices will be able to be put it, and taken out at a later date. If my heart shows signs that I need the pacemaker, we will put it in, but at a later date.



After having 11 different surgeries last year, I am kinda calm about this surgery in the morning, with the exception that this is my heart.



Please pray for my anixousness between then and now. Pray that my port-a-cath will not have a clog and will be able to be used with no issues. Pray for the Dr.'s and nurses as they work on my heart. Pray that nothing goes wrong.

This should be an outpatient surgery, but I am taking an over night bag just in case.

Port-a-Cath surgery

I am having surgery tomorrow morning*Friday* at 7:30am. I have to be at the hospital at 6am, which means we leave the house at 5am, since we live a hour away. I should be home by noon, and the surgery itself shouldn't take more than 1 hr to complete. I am having a port-a-cath put it. It will be located just underneath the skin near my left collarbone. So, the next time I need and IV, instead of being the human pin cushion, they will just stick the needle in my port, and it will go directly into the line.


Tomorrow, I am also having my PICC line removed. I actually had to use my PICC line on Tues. for a blood draw. The nurse got blood without needles in less than 2 min.

My 1 concern about my PICC being removed is that the skin around my PICC line is badly blistered, red and swollen. I have been having alot of allergic reactions from all the tape that is holding the PICC line in place. It will take atleast a month for my skin to be completly healed. Please pray that my skin will heal soon and that I won't get an infection.

I will be sedated for my surgery. I am happy about that. Ihave already had my pain meds increased for this surgery and for the first time in a while, I am at the max dose for my pain patch and it alone is relieving all my pain. Even the pain in my knee and leg.

I did finally get the final MRI report on my knee and I tore my PCL ligament and I am missing alot of cartilidge from my knee. Compared to the MRI that I had done in late Aug., my knee now looks nothing like my knee then did. It is very swollen, about the size of a grapefruit. My mobility is very decreased. It hurts to put pressure on it, I can't walk very well, and my knee gives out on me atleast once a day. My knee surgery is scheduled for Nov. 18th, but more on that in a different e-mail.

I am focusing on one surgery at a time.

I would like to share something that really hit home when I read it.
" God may not be as interested in changing our circumstances as He is in seeing out circumstances change us."

Myself, and alot of other people have been praying for me (incuding you) for the past 2 1/2 years. Praying for God to heal me and for my health to improve. Well, God hasn't healed me and my health has only gotten worse, but my faith, my courage, my love for life have only gotten stronger these past few years.
I am not the same person I was 2 1/2 years ago. My circumstances have changed me in ways I never thought were possible.


Please pray for the surgeon and nurses as they work on me tomorrow. Pray for not a lot of post-op pain and for a quick recovery.

Unexpected Surgery Round 2

I had a very unexpected surgery this morning. My new tube broke/came out yesterday (yes, the same one I had put in 2 weeks ago) and I spent most of the Sunday afternoon in the ER waiting for a surgery that never happened for 2 reasons 1) no one read my chart to see that I have to be sedated for this surgery ( it was going to be done w/o sedating me) 2) they didn't/couldn't find the correct tube. So, surgery took place about 10am. I brought the correct tube, so they knew what to use. I have made up my mind that if this tube falls out again, I will NOT have another surgery to have a new one put in. This is my 6th surgery for a new tube in 5 months. After today, I won't do it again. I don't know what time I will be home, but probably mid-late afternoon.

Friday morning

Nothing big going on here. It was HOT today, but suppose to rain all day tomorrow.
I did end up having a very unexpected emergency surgery Monday afternoon, but I am already recovered from it and now I'm looking forward to my nerve block this coming Monday morning.
Actually, I am a little scared and nervous of the procedure, as I have never had one before and I'm scared of what could happen and what could go wrong. Hopefully, it will work and I will be able to go off the fentanyl for a while.

I have a prayer need for a family I have mentioned before. The family in Houston that has sextuplets. Three of them died shortly after birth, and 3 girls are still alive. The girls are now 2 mths. Ashlyn, the smallest weighing in at 13oz, is not doing well. Some of her systems are shutting down, and even though she is still on a vent, she is fighting for oxygen and not breathing well. She has been fighting for a while now, but now it seems that she may be loosing this fight.
Please pray for the baby. Pray for the parents. Pray that the Dr. & nurses will be able keep this little girl alive.

The Lord is with me... us

Before I begin, Dakota is need lots of prayers tonight. She's back in the PICU and on a vent and sedated. Tomorrow is Kayleigh's funeral/memorial service. For those unable to attend (it's in North Carolina) the family is asking that at 4pm, where ever you are that you release pink balloons into the sky to float away, and on the balloons please write the following:
On Sunday (May 17th), at 4:00PM(EST) after the memorial, we will be letting off pink balloons in Kayleigh's name. Tied to each balloon will be a card that reads:

Kayleigh Anne Freeman

Our One Pound Miracle from God

(6/23/08 - 5/11/09)

www.KayleighAnneFreeman.blogspot.com

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On to me. The past 48 hrs have indescribable. Thursday I remember not feeling well that day and I was "taking it easy" and had taken a nap. After waking up, I went into my kitchen to get something to eat. All of a sudden I felt very faint, I remember trying to get into the living room to sit, but didn't make it. I fainted and fell face first on to my tiled floors. I blacked out, and came to about 5 min. later. When I came to I realized I was laying in a pool of blood. I had hit my teeth and bit my lip in the fall. I laid there for a few mins to come to and see if anything was broken and if I could stand up. I got up, found my phone and called 911. The paramedics came and when they took my blood pressure it was in the low 80's (not good). They loaded me into the ambulance and off we went to the hospital. On the ride over, I called my pastor and he met me at the hospital. I also called one of my aunt's ( my mom is out of town taking care of another one of her sister's who is sick and can't be left alone). My aunt arrived shortly after I did. I had 25 x-rays done and 2 CAT scans, they could find nothing wrong. My BP never got above 100 ( still not good), but they let me go home anyways. Other than being sore and bruised, I had no other injuries. But, they also never determined why I fainted. Thursday night, I spent the night and another one of my aunt's houses, so I wouldn't be alone if something happened. I spent all of Friday morning resting at my grandmother's house ( my aunt took her to the Dr). When my aunt brought my grandmother back home, she took me back to my house.

I was not back to 100% normal on Friday. I had only been home for about a hour Friday afternoon, when 2 things happened. One, I was flushing my feeding tube ( a new one that was put in last week) and while flushing it, it broke in half and slid out. (that wasn't suppose to happen). After the tube came out, I had another fainting spell. This time I didn't fall, because I was sitting in a chair, but I did black out. Because the tube came out I only had a 1-2 hour window to put a new one in, before the hole would start to close. Knowing I couldn't drive, I called 911 again, and got another ride to the ER. This time my BP was all over the place. It would drop into the 80's or spike into the 150's ( not good either). I had more tests done, labs taken, etc, but the Dr.'s still could find no reason for my fainting spells. My tube was a whole different story. Because too much time had passed, almost 5 hrs, the hole was already closed (or so I thought). At 10pm the radiology team came and got me and took me to radiology and tried to put a new, smaller, the 1st size tube in. I was awake, but also fully sedated. The surgery was a success on the 1st try and I didn't think that it would be, and we would have to go the long way (open surgery) to put it back in. I was released at midnight to my aunt, who brought me home, and I've been home alone ever since.

I have been fine today, but have slept most of the day. I am sore from surgery and my fall. I have an appt. first thing Monday morning with my reg. Dr. to see if she/ we can figure out what is going on. This sort of thing has NEVER happened before, so we are quite confused. This morning 2 of my aunts, 1 uncle, and my grandmother left to go on vacation to New Mexico. My mom is still out of town, taking care of her sister, and God is taking care of me today.

But, I want to say that all of last night I was in constant communication (texting) with the members of my Community Group, and although they could not be with me physically, I knew that they were praying for me constantly. I had one member from my group who visited for about a hour, but the rest of the members were VERY supportive of me. I thank God for them and what they did for me last night. I have gotten several e-mails and texts from them today checking in on me too.

I had a little bit of "free" time right before my surgery and I was really freaking out, so I pulled out my Bible and started reading scripture. I started reading the 23rd Psalm, but then I found this passage:

Psalm 91: 14-16

"Because he loves me," says the Lord, "I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation."

I started reading it and praying it, and I felt this intense peace about my surgery, as I was in the room and being prepped.

I have learned or re-learned that the LORD is ALWAYS with us. The verse above says it all. So many times I think that we get too busy in our lives and when something goes wrong we think that the Lord has left us. But that is far from the truth. In our weakest times and moments, that is when Christ is at HIS strongest. And all we have to do is ask. Not even that, just believe that God is always with us and He never leaves us or forsakes us. He promises us that.

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Please keep me in your prayers. Pray that the Dr.'s can figure out what is going on and what is causing my health problems. My mom comes home tomorrow. My appt is Monday morning.

Please keep Dakota and Kayleigh's family in your prayers as well.

New person & Stellan's heart surgery

Tonight I am very heavy hearted. For several reasons.

Stellan took a turn for the worse this evening. His SVT came back out of the blue and he has NOT been able to break out of it on his own and the drugs are not helping. He is having heart surgery TOMORROW morning (8:30am Boston time) and after reading his mother's description of what is suppose to happen, I started crying. Stellan needs all the prayers he can get tomorrow. Only a miracle will heal Stellan's heart tomorrow, but thankfully I KNOW the Great Physcian.
Ephesians 3:20 sums what what needs to happen tomorrow in order for Stellan to live and the surgery to be a success. "Now glory be to God! By his mighty power at work within us, he is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope."
Please take time to read Stellan's blog tonight. His mother gives SPECIFIC instructions on how and what to pray for them tomorrow. Prayers for Stellan's family (in Boston and at home in Minnesota), for the surgeons, and all involved tomorrow.

I had talk theraphy this afternoon. It was exhausting for me, I talked about alot, but what I said is life changing. It was my first session since going through my "trial" that started just under 3 weeks ago. My therapist actually looked at me and said that, not only am I a completly different person than I was 3 weeks ago, but I look better too. I told her that after going through what I did I feel like a different person. My mind is clearer and I have a much better outlook on life. But, with that being said, I am learning to be a different person. I am taking baby steps, and already have 2 behind me. 1) I went to church yesterday morning. The preacher's sermon was on trials and spoke right to me. 2) I have turned to God, scripture, and my Christian music while going through this. I have fought my battles and demons these past 3 weeks and won, something that I didn't do before.
I have more on this in a post I'm working on later.
I see God more clearly than I ever did before.

Medical Update for this week

This is going to be a big week for me health wise.
Today I went to my pain management Dr. and had a long talk about my meds, and other social and psychological issues concerning my meds and my illness.
On Thursday I will be having blood work done to test my kidney function and some other things related to a new drug that I started that requires blood work every month. I have to be fasting for 8-12 hrs on for this blood work. But, the bigger thing is that I have to be fasting all day for my Hydascan, and it isn't until 1pm, and then the test takes 2-3 hours. So, by the time the test is over I will be starving. Luckily, there are many restaurants in the area where I will be having my test and blood work, so I can stop in and eat anywhere.
Also on Thursday I am having a Hydascan done, which will determine how much my gallbladder is or isn't working. If it isn't working, than my surgeon will remove it, if it is working, than I will be very upset, because that will mean more questions than answers.
So, my odd prayer request for the week is that the Hydascan WILL show that my gallbladder is not working. My grandfather died of gallbladder issues this past Dec., so we know gallbladder issues run in the family.
Please also, keep me in your prayers all the way around. I'm going through a really hard time right now, because my life has been put on hold, and I am having to try to find a "new" life.

Surgery News

After spending almost 3 hours waiting to see the Dr. this afternoon. ( my appt. was suppose to be at 3:30pm, and I saw the Dr. at 6:15pm), he has decided to wait to do any surgery this week. I am totally bummed.
He is going to consult my Gastro Dr. first to see just how bad my gallbladder is. He doesn't know what, if anything will be done about my feeding tube.
And the surgery to fix my stomach issues is NOT done in my hometown. I will either go to Dallas or Houston to have a "gastric neurotransmitter- or pacemaker" inserted into my stomach. The pacemaker will send signals to the nerves to tell them to work again. Just like a pacemaker for the heart. This surgery is very new, and there aren't any surgeons in my hometown that do it. But, my surgeon is going to call his friends in both cities to see who wants to take my case.

Thank you for continuing to praying, and I will keep you updated about a surgery date.

Emily

What is the world coming to?

Today has been an OK day. I was suppose to have a class at the gym this afternoon, but didn't feel well, and cancelled.
I found out some bad news too. 1. One of my best friend's husband was laid-off from his job today. My friend is newly pregnant, and is having normal morning sickness, but please pray for this baby and for God to protect it and let it grow normally, and for the baby to join the world in 8 months. Pray that the husband will be able to find a new job.
2. I also found out that another friend of mine's uncle was killed in a tragic accident in Hawaii. After the autopsy, he or his ashes will be flown back to Texas. Please pray for the family as they deal with his sudden death.

This week and next feel like "normal" considering I am looking at having another surgery. I'm a bit nervous over my endoscopy this THURSDAY, only because I'm afraid I'll have complications like I had last time ( in July of 08). Also, if I'm facing another surgery, than that's more time in the hospital and more time recovering.
Tomorrow I have an appt. with my pain management Dr. For a week now I have been crushing my pills and adding water to turn into liquid and putting it in my tube. Tomorrow, I am hoping that he'll give me liquid pain meds.

I'm just not doing well. Please keep me in your prayers.

Also, I set up a medical acct. at my bank today for donations, all the info is in the box to the right of this.

Urgent Prayers Needed

My grandfather is very ill and was rushed to and admitted to the hospital this afternoon. It has been determined that he has a gallstone that is very large and is blocking his entire gallbladder. Because of his age (he's 87) and current bad health and his heart condition there are only 2 options: 1) drain the gallbladder, but leave the gallstone, which is only a temp. fix and will not relieve the pain he's in or 2) do surgery to remove the gallbladder and stone, which he will probably NOT survive the surgery. He's in alot of pain, and is on a morphine pump, it' s not working, but they isn't anything else they can give him because of his heart. The surgeon told him that he could tell that my grandfather is not one for drastic measures to be taken, and my grandfather said yes, that if something happens he wants no measures to be taken to try to save him.
All of the family has been called and everyone is meeting at the hospital tomorrow morning. On top of all this, my grandmother is very ill as well, and we have been trying to pursade her to go to the Dr. , but she refuses.
Please pray for my grandfather, my family, and for the Dr.'s and nurses that are taking care of him. Pray that God's will will be done and that if it's time for my grandfather to go to Heaven that God will prepare the family.
I will update tomorrow as I know more.

My New Year's Eve

Monday night (New Year's Eve) I had my night nanny job for the 4 week old.
Now, a little background on the job. I started when he was 3 days old. His mom is the type of person who doesn't function without sleep, I completly understand. I took a week off due to my car accident and it being Christmas. Well, before I left he started to throw up after he would eat his bottles. Not spit up, all out throw up. Now, I can't throw up, never have been and never will be (more on that at a later date), so to me a lot of throw up looks gross. But his, mom said that he was throwing up half his bottles (1-3 hrs after he ate), I told her that's not normal and to talk to the peed about it at his next check up. She did and said that the Dr said it was just spit up and to change his bottles. She did all that and he was fine... for 1 week. Last Thursday night he started throwing up again. Monday night he threw up 3 times in the 13 hours I was there, bad enough each to time to require a bath. During one of his bath's I felt a lump in his stomach but thought nothing of it, since his cord had just fallen off. Tuesday morning I stayed late and the mom and I talk and she asked for my professional opinion (with me being a professional nanny, and she repeatdly says that I have more experience and time with children then she does), so I told her that I thought the Dr. was wrong and she should go back and tell the peed that he is throwing up, NOT spitting up. I thought it was acid reflux and he need to get on some meds. I also thought that he was getting dehydrated because he had been throwing up so much and he had a real restless night the night before. Well, she got to thinking about it and called the Medical Exchange which called the peed on call. When the mom and the peed talked the peed told her if she thought he was dehydrated to take him into the children's ER. Well, she did that and then did some tests, and on the x-rays it was discovered that he had a blockage in between in stomach and large intestine.!!! They immediatly prepped him for surgery and went in to remove it. When I found this out I was shocked!!! I never thought that it would be that bad. The baby came home the next day, and is doing great. His mom kept saying that I was right and that she is so glad that she listened to me. I just told her what I knew from my own personal experiences that her baby was ill.