Friday, March 23, 2012


My mom was taken to a hospice home this evening. The Dr.'s have done all they can for my mom, but she still needs alot of nursing care. The Dr.'s told my family that my mom doesn't have very much time left.
We didn't know how bad the cancer is, but it is all over her body, and spreading more quickly than they can keep up. Plus, she hasn't been responding to the meds thy are giving her.
I am heartbroken. I love my mother so much, and she and I are all we have. I can't imagine losing her this way and this fast.
My family (my mom's brother and sisters and her mom) are heartbroken to, my mom got sick so quickly that this totally blindsided us.
So know I am in my  mind planning my mom's funeral, thinking of what I am going to do after she is gone; continue living in our house, or something else.

Please pray for a miracle, and if not that than pray for peace... for all of us, especially my mom. That she won't die alone and in pain.

Also, I had my 4th surgery this year, this past Tuesday. It was to put in a NG (nasel-gastric) tube. It's not doing real well, and I will hopefully and probably be having this tube pulled out next week. The next and last choice is TPN (liquid feeds given through an IV or port )  feeds. My Dr. told me that he was quite certain that this tube wasn't going to work, given my past history with feeding tubes; but we had to try it, to say we did, and not just skip to the TPN feeds. 

I have quite a bit of other health issues going on that I need to be addressed soon, but who do I put first. Myself, who isn't strong enough physically to deal with all that is going on with my mom. Or my mom, who is dying and we don't know how long she will be here for.
It's a hard choice, but I am keeping my eyes toward Heaven and trusting that God will lead me down the right path.

Please just continue praying for my family, myself, and my mom.

1 comment:

Jaime said...

Praying for you and your mom Emily, may you both find peace during this time.